Southern Legitimacy Statement:
I am a lifelong resident of Bergen County NJ. I break out in hives when I drive south of Exit 13 on the NJ Turnpike. But I do believe that Jersey girls and our Southern peers are bound in sisterhood by our shared appreciation for hair with body and mutual acceptance of our role as some of the few natural predators of stinkbugs.
1. Virginia ham is proof of the existence of God and the insurmountable obstacle to my ever becoming a vegetarian.
2. Bruton Parish Church is my second favorite church in the whole wide wold.
3. I know that “Bless his heart” means “I hate that guy, he’s a total ass.”
4. I have been to the Piggly Wiggly. And when I was there an old man touched my bare arm with a gallon of freezing cold milk. After I jumped, he said, “Just checkin’ to see if you were a Yankee.” I said, “F**k off.” He said, “Yep. Yankee.”
5. I know that Orlando, while located technically IN the South, has more in common with Vegas than Atlanta. I confess to loving it anyway.
6. The Oldest Living Confederate Widow Tells All is on my top 10 favorite books of all time list. My top 100 list would include Twain, Walker, Morrison, Faulkner, and John Jakes’ North and South trilogy (yes, all three volumes), sadly, at a rank much higher on the list than it rightfully deserves, but hey, we all have our guilty pleasures.Read more