The Dead Mule School of Southern Literature

Diane Hoover Bechtler – Illiteracy

Fiction

Don’t even think about parking in that handicap spot. You know, what I mean, the spots closest to the door, the ones with the big wheelchair sign on them. Don’t even think about it. I am watching.

Is your handicap illiteracy? You have parked illegally in a handicap only parking spot and not only do you lack a hangtag or license plate, I saw you prance out of your German convertible luxury car. You showed no shame, no awareness of your wrongdoing. You had no thought for the handicapped person, who was going to arrive in five minutes. That person may be me and if it is, I will have no problem saying terrible things to you. I may even call the police once I get inside the grocery store. I will report you for your crime and I will laugh as the officer writes your ticket for $500.